I’m beginning to think that my Editor doesn’t like me very much. He keeps promising me wonderful games, games so delightful, so fantastic, that to be without them makes life completely pointless. Then, after waiting by my letterbox for days, the game arrives… and it’s this. Yeah, cheers Luke. Now you know why I’m so vulgar, I just can’t help it, it’s these damn games!

Firstly, in case you hadn’t bothered to read the title, the game is New Legends, for the Xbox. As I have already mentioned, the game was supposed to be quite a little corker. A ‘great oriental hack and Slash Onimusha style affair’, Luke said. Bloody liar, I say.

Okay, I may sound like I’m being unfair here, as I’m sure the game may have a few fans out there. But this game has so many obvious faults that it wound me up beyond belief! Regular readers may notice that I can’t stand bug filled, repetitive, unoriginal games (not that anyone should like them!). That is why I really don’t like this game…

The story of New Legends goes something along the lines of an ancient empire being overthrown by an evil lord with hordes of undead warriors at his side and yadda, yadda, blah, blah… Look, just take the plot of Onimusha and use that, ok? It’s nearly identical, as the developers here obviously couldn’t be bothered to write their own.

Right. Calm down. Breath. Good…. Onto one of the many problems that I encountered with this title, the graphics. How many of you bought an so that you could play games with superb, mind blowing visuals? Okay, quite a few. So hands up who bought one so that they could experience some nice high-resolution graphics? No one? Funny that. As you may have guessed, New Legends falls flat on it’s face at the first hurdle, the graphics are uninspired, boring and unworthy of gracing a console such as the Xbox. Boring landscapes, poor characters and general blandness. Ugh. Come on, at least make the effort to put in some nice effects here! Nope, none of those here either. As for the camera, it chooses some really stupid moments to zoom out, leaving you controlling a small speck that is trying to fight five other small specks, everything gets so confused that you just have to run around until the camera zooms in again. You may not be able to see who you are fighting, but at least you know which one you are!